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Go Back   FZ1OA Message Board > FZ1 & Fazer Owners Association > Bored Time (Games & Humor)

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Old 11-26-2018, 08:13 PM   #1341
LiquidSilver
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I told my girlfriend she painted her eyebrows on too high. She looked surprised.

Someone asked me what my view of Lesbian Relationships was. I told them 1080p if it's available.


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Old 11-27-2018, 07:52 AM   #1342
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Old 12-13-2018, 05:26 PM   #1343
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Old 01-29-2019, 12:28 PM   #1344
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for the weather...


" My ex-wife was so cold......"

" How cold was she?"

" She was so cold, when she spread her legs, a light came on"
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Old 01-29-2019, 03:50 PM   #1345
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Quote:
Originally Posted by COOP View Post
for the weather...


" My ex-wife was so cold......"

" How cold was she?"

" She was so cold, when she spread her legs, a light came on"

Looks for like button.

During one of the last arguments with my ex-wife, we were in the kitchen.
I opened up the freezer door and said, "Here warm up a little". She started to crack a smile then suppressed it and got even angrier that I almost made her laugh.
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Old 01-29-2019, 07:54 PM   #1346
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LiquidSilver View Post

Looks for like button.

During one of the last arguments with my ex-wife, we were in the kitchen.
I opened up the freezer door and said, "Here warm up a little". She started to crack a smile then suppressed it and got even angrier that I almost made her laugh.
Can I use that? Please?
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Old 01-29-2019, 11:18 PM   #1347
AndyW
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Good one. I can relate..
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Old 01-30-2019, 10:39 AM   #1348
LiquidSilver
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WileECoyote View Post
Can I use that? Please?
You gonna use it on your future ex-wife?
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Old 01-30-2019, 03:26 PM   #1349
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LiquidSilver View Post
You gonna use it on your future ex-wife?
since we're already split up, yes sir I am.
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Old 02-01-2019, 09:02 AM   #1350
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Why seniors never change their passwords

WINDOWS:
Please enter your new password.

USER:
Cabbage

WINDOWS:
Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.

USER:
Boiled cabbage

WINDOWS:
Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.

USER:
1 boiled cabbage

WINDOWS:
Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces

USER:
50damnboiledcabbages

WINDOWS:
Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character

USER:
50DAMNboiledcabbages

WINDOWS:
Sorry the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively..

USER:
50damnBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon'tGiveM eAccessNow !

WINDOWS:
Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.

USER:
ReallyPissedOff50DamnBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAss IfYouDontGiveMeAccessNow

WINDOWS:
Sorry, that password is already in use


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Old 02-01-2019, 09:07 AM   #1351
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Old 02-01-2019, 10:29 AM   #1352
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Thats a good 'un....................

Everyday struggle at work. I.T. insists we change pw every month now.
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Old 03-06-2019, 09:11 AM   #1353
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New teacher

A former Sergeant in the Marine Corps took a new job as a high
school teacher.

Just before the school year started, he injured his back.
He was required to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of
his body. Fortunately, the cast fit under his shirt and wasn't
noticeable.

On the first day of class, he found himself assigned to the
toughest students in the school. The smart punks, having
already heard the new teacher was a former Marine, were leery
of him and he knew they would be testing his discipline in the
classroom.

Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, the new teacher
opened the window wide and sat down at his desk. When a
strong breeze made his tie flap, he picked up a stapler and
stapled the tie to his chest.

Dead silence....
The rest of the year went very smoothly.
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Old 05-06-2019, 02:41 PM   #1354
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The night light

A 90-year-old man goes for a physical. All of his tests come back with
normal results.

The doctor says, "Larry, everything looks great. How are you doing
mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?"

Larry replies, "God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so
He's fixed it so when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the
bathroom, poof! The light goes on. When I'm done, poof! The light goes off."

"Wow, that's incredible," the doctor says.

A little later in the day, the doctor calls Larry's wife. "Bonnie," he
says, "Larry is doing fine! But I had to call you because I'm in awe
of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the
night, and poof, the light goes on in the bathroom, and when he's
done, poof, the light goes off?"

"Oh sweet Jesus," exclaims Bonnie. "He's peeing in the refrigerator again!"
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Old 05-09-2019, 04:27 PM   #1355
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Old 05-18-2019, 05:53 AM   #1356
rdcusmc
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keytickler View Post
A former Sergeant in the Marine Corps took a new job as a high
school teacher.

Just before the school year started, he injured his back.
He was required to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of
his body. Fortunately, the cast fit under his shirt and wasn't
noticeable.

On the first day of class, he found himself assigned to the
toughest students in the school. The smart punks, having
already heard the new teacher was a former Marine, were leery
of him and he knew they would be testing his discipline in the
classroom.

Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, the new teacher
opened the window wide and sat down at his desk. When a
strong breeze made his tie flap, he picked up a stapler and
stapled the tie to his chest.

Dead silence....
The rest of the year went very smoothly.
LMAO YES!!

HOORAH!!

SF
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Old 05-28-2019, 07:38 AM   #1357
MichaelFZ1
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Literally the greatest video ever!

https://youtu.be/4IRB0sxw-YU

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